Turning

September first and the first chilly morning of the season with temps probably in the low 40's. I went out to the Rutland State Park portion of the Central Mass Rail Trail and ran continuously for 30 minutes. For a runner, this does not sound like much. For an ultra runner, like even less. But for me, a guy who is just now emerging from a metaphorical dusty coffin, it feels like victory. It's been a long time since I ran last. Maybe years. 

What a beautiful morning. The woods are still green but the seasonal change is in the air. At the end of the trail I could see my breath after getting carried away and sprinting for the last few seconds. No need for that stuff right now. That's greed or vanity or something, but the effort made me gag a couple of times as if to discipline me. Humility. It's enough to show up and do what you said you would do. And this morning, I did that. 

The surface I ran on was a flat, hard-packed, dirt and gravel. Probably a lot like the Cowboy Trail in northern Nebraska which is home to the Cowboy 200 Ultramarathon. Two-hundred miles inside of 84 hours. I heard about it last month and the idea has crept into me. Today's run marked the first milestone in my vague, not-entirely-imaginary, training plan. I'm still contemplating whether I want to take the race on or not. 

I'm going through some positive changes right now, and for the last few days everything seems possible. This is in stark contrast to the couple or few years of steady depletion and depression I'm emerging from in which nothing positive seemed possible. I'm afraid of falling back. I don't want to go back in there. 

Something in me just now said, "Then don't!". 

Registration for 2024's race hasn't opened yet. This year's race occurs later this month.