To linger in bed after waking beside someone you love in a particular way can be heavenly. No matter how long that person stays there with you, it's not long enough. How rare a thing that is.
To linger in bed after waking alone feels different. It can be a relaxed and comfortable experience to be sure, but there's always this feeling that what belongs there is absent. The best you can do, I have found, is to adjust the volume control on that feeling. Maybe it's best not to linger too long.
Getting the kitchen floor fixed seems to have freed something up. Energy. Flow. Life. Like removing a dam from a river or a grape from an obstructed airway. It's a trickle though not a torrent. Don't get too crazy. My blood is moving within my body though, and I'm breathing again. A parallel process is taking place inside my house.
The spice cabinet. I threw out the curry powder that was best used 20 years ago. The ten year old green tea bags. A small bottle of Tabasco, never opened, that expired in 2017. And then the OTC medications, all expired for just as long. I pour one thousand pills out of plastic containers into a plastic bag and got it out of my house. I notice the partially painted walls and remember the sensation of dropping dead before the work was completed. How long ago was that?
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